Patrick Hayes had a towering presence in both stature and spirit.
Standing at 6’5” with a head of blonde hair, Patrick appeared intimidating at first glance, naturally commanding attention in any room he entered. But that imposing impression quickly faded, the atmosphere subtly shifting the moment Patrick offered a flash of his “million-dollar smile” or a quick, disarming joke, his laughter like music.
The 61 year old exuded a magnetic warmth and an easy charm that instantly made those around him feel at ease. Wherever he went, people knew him, or felt like they did.
Friends and family gathered on Saturday at Jordanelle State Park — Patrick’s playground — for a tender, heartfelt celebration of his life nearly nine months after it was cut short. Patrick was shot and killed in a road rage incident at the Ross Creek entrance on Sept. 25, 2024, just a half a mile from his home and a short stretch from the area where loved ones came together to honor his memory.
The Hideout community was rattled by the news of Patrick’s death.
Alan and Shelley Baumgardner lived next to Patrick and his fiancée, Sue Ann Kern, for three years. A few days before Patrick died, the two couples spent a great day celebrating Oktoberfest at Snowbird Mountain Resort. The men bonded over swimming and water polo — sports Patrick was passionate about — and developed a friendship that extended beyond neighborly duties.
The Baumgardners described Patrick as someone with a great heart who was always willing to lend a hand. They said their neighborhood is close-knit, with Patrick and Sue Ann meeting up with other couples for community events and concerts. Patrick was also well known for chatting with neighbors during daily walks with his beloved dog, Tilly.
Everyone was shocked to learn that Patrick was dead last fall and that his killer remained on the loose. Some even questioned their safety.
The Wasatch County Sheriff’s Office spent weeks looking for a suspect driving a Jeep Gladiator who was seen on surveillance footage fatally wounding Patrick and driving away without calling 911.
A 62-year-old Peoa man, Greg Kyle DeBoer, was detained in mid-November and questioned about the shooting, during which DeBoer claimed “he acted in self-defense.” Law enforcement claims Patrick was carrying a pocket knife and a baton while yelling profanities at DeBoer.
In late December, DeBoer was arrested and charged with obstruction of justice after he admitted burying the gun used to shoot Patrick. His friends and family say it’s not enough. While they want DeBoer to be charged with homicide, Wasatch County Sheriff Jared Rigby has said “more evidence” would be necessary to pursue such a crime.
The situation remains an open wound for Patrick’s loved ones.
Mike Hayes, the oldest of the four boys, said there was a knot in his stomach being at the Ross Creek day use area so close to where his brother was killed. Still, he felt like being there was helping to reclaim Patrick’s life.
“He loved this place,” Mike said. “After Pat was murdered, it makes you think about the (old) times.”
The four brothers, each separated by two years, grew up outside of Los Angeles. They spent most of their free time outdoors swimming, camping or hiking. During vacations and weekends, they traveled up the coast from one body of water to the next, stopping at Big Sur, Russian Gulch State Park and the Devil’s Punchbowl.
Mike was the first to move to Utah to attend university. Then Matt Hayes, the second oldest, did. Patrick came next. The youngest, Andy Hayes, followed.
Patrick, gregarious and the life of the party, majored in economics and found a career in sales. His brothers said if he were here today, Patrick’s voice would be unmistakable as he made his way through the crowd to socialize with everyone. Patrick was the type of man who could walk into a bar, sit at the counter and leave with a new friend — unlike his brothers, who were much more reserved.
Each of the Hayes boys had a different relationship with Patrick, one that they said evolved over the years as they matured.
Mike had a unique influence as the oldest, acting as a guiding force. Closer in age, Matt and Patrick swam and played water polo together in college. Their bond was cemented as they grew older, traveling around the world together with their kids to watch matches. Andy and Patrick were close, too. The youngest brothers lived together after high school and were always together until Patrick married.
Though his first marriage ended, Patrick became a father to his son Christian Hayes, who his brothers said keeps his spirit alive. Patrick was an active father committed to maintaining a positive co-parenting relationship with his first wife. He had spent the evening of Sept. 25 with Christian before he was shot in the chest by DeBoer. Christian is suing DeBoer for $20 million.
Then, more than a decade ago, Patrick met Sue Ann. Their first date was at a Red Robin right before Thanksgiving. Sue Ann recalled Patrick’s gentle, kind nature as he left his wallet and keys on the table when he used the restroom. Years later, they took a ski trip to Telluride, boated around Coeur d’Alene Lake, and swam with sea turtles in Costa Rica — Patrick’s signature smile plastered to his face through it all.
His family and friends said Sue Ann was the love of his life and a steady heartbeat that kept Patrick going. Patrick had proposed, but the couple put off the wedding to help one of Sue Ann’s daughters, who recently became engaged as well, plan for hers.
Sue Ann described how the loss has left a hole in her heart and how the community has rallied to support her. It’s difficult for her to imagine the first year without Patrick and his infectious energy. Her daughter, Sam Kern, thanked the community for taking care of Sue Ann, saying the kitchen is always full and people are always checking in on her.
“The hardest part is yet to come,” Sue Ann said.
For Matt, the feelings associated with Patrick’s death have turned from sorrow to anger. Andy agreed. The brothers said being at Jordanelle State Park brings back painful memories, and the lack of charges has done little to dampen the grief or offer a sense of relief.
“There has to be some sort of justice,” Andy said. “How can someone do that without consequence?”
Sue Ann and the Hayes family struggle to make sense of Patrick’s death, questioning how they can find closure when the case is “far from over” and “justice has not been served.” They want DeBoer to take responsibility for killing Patrick, and said they can’t move on or find forgiveness until that happens.
They’ve also advocated for new laws in Utah that would impose harsher criminal penalties for road rage altercations or leaving the scene of a crime. DeBoer faces a single obstruction of justice charge, a second-degree felony punishable by up to 15 years in prison and a fine of up to $10,000. His next court appearance is scheduled for July 9.
“It shouldn’t take a tragedy to spark change,” Mike said, adding that the Hayes family hopes and prays justice will play out.
Still, the fury doesn’t burn quite as hot while surrounded by Patrick’s friends, who all shared stories about how they’ll miss the way he lived boldly, laughed deeply and loved with his whole heart.
Patrick didn’t tiptoe through life. Rather, he cannonballed in.