“Truth. Courage. Love.” was a hard book for Terry Sidford to write, because it was her own story.
Sidford, a Park City-based motivational speaker, life coach, author, television host and sought-after motivational TEDx speaker, confessed she had an anxiety attack just before she published the book a few weeks ago.
“I was worried it was going to make someone mad,” she said. “But I really tried to make a book about my choices, and not throw anybody under the bus.”
“Truth. Courage. Love.” shares raw and intimate stories of loss, heartache, forgiveness, triumph, and rising against all odds, according to Sidford.
“I turned adversity into triumph and success by digging deep, never giving up, and learning invaluable lessons that truth can lead to courage, and courage can lead to love,” she said.
Sidford learned aspects of those lessons as she looked deeply into the relationship she shared with her divorced parents, which she relays in the book.
“My mom was an alcoholic, and I chose to use that story as an excuse for me to not be smart in school,” Sidford said. “When I changed my perspective, and saw her as the one who was really in pain, I realized how wonderful a person my mom was, and that changed my whole perspective. She has since gone back to school and became a nurse.”
Sidford’s relationship with her father was also filled with high points and divots.
“My sister and I ran away when I was 7 and she was 12,” Sidford said. “It was a hard night with mom, so we called my dad to tell him we are walking towards his house and that we hoped he would find us.”
While Sidford’s father was loving and nurturing, he was living the ’70s lifestyle.
“My sister and I were introduced to the hippie lifestyle, and the things that went with it,” she said.
Other stories in the book include a recount of Sidford’s life with a con artist boyfriend, her divorce, and her journey building up the courage that eventually led her to find her second husband.
“It’s about never giving up on things when I thought I’d be single for the rest of my life,” she said.
The idea for Sidford to write “Truth. Courage. Love.” began, in part, while she was writing her first book, “One Hundred Hearts: Inspiring Stories From the Women Who Lived Them,” which was published in 2015.
“For a lot of the women featured in the book, it was the first time they had shared their own stories about courage,” she said. “Then the people who helped me put those stories together would ask me questions about my own story, and I always wondered why they were asking me the questions.”
Then during a book reading and signing, Sidford was asked to talk about her own courage.
“To that point, I never had seen myself as courageous, even though I had written a book about it,” she said. “And I began really thinking about courage ever since.”
Courage was a theme Sidford addressed during a TEDx Talk a couple of years ago, and she shared many of her own stories of vulnerability.
“It was truly one of the most liberating moments of my life, because I had hidden those stories for as long as I could remember,” she said. “I always tried to put on that big smile and look good on the outside.”
The idea of telling her story and the whole truth surrounding it had percolated in Sidford’s mind until she recently celebrated her 60th birthday.
“I trusted my intuition to lead me courageously to the truth in all things and stories that even my own kids didn’t know,” she said. “I was able to reflect on my life and do some soul searching. And I came to realize that I would not be doing what I’m doing today — living my dream of helping other people and having a wonderful husband and family — if I hadn’t gone through a lot of adversity.”
Adversity taught Sidford some valuable lessons.
“I looked back at terrible situations that I had been in, how I got there, and what I had to do about it to get out,” she said. “It helped me grow. I used adversity to grow.”
Another lesson Sidford learned from adversity was that she needed to find ways to forgive people in order to continue her growth.
“I had to forgive to let go,” she said. “There is a negative energy when you don’t forgive someone. Yes, there are times when you can help make them accountable for what they did, but you need to be careful that you don’t let that drag you under. Forgiveness allowed me to let go, return to love, and change the story that held me hostage.”
People need to know that bad things will happen, Sidford said.
“We need to remember that we will not walk this planet free of trials,” she said. “We’re here to learn and grow and help each other.”
Sidford hopes her book will help readers to embrace their pasts and find ways to live their best lives.
“You can wish bad things didn’t happen, but they always do,” she said. “So you can be proud you made it through these things and emerge stronger. I would not be who I am today without all the lessons that led me back to my true self, and now I get to inspire others by sharing my story.”